Losing interest

So it seems I have the attention span of a small insect. Having spent all day doing nothing, I've come home, checked my emails multiple times and so far avoided work. Or more specifically, I've opened the article I'm meant to be reading, stared at the page for a while and then decided that there are so many better things to do....

So I've ultimately retreated to this blog. And sat here with my cup of tea and my reflective mood, it's suddenly dawned on me that I hae increasingly lost interest in a lot of things recently. I used to work extremely hard, reading for hours on end and actually taken some enjoyment out of it and yet now, it's a small miracle if I can manage to read a ten page article in under an hour without resorting to just random doodles.

But it's not just my work that seems to have suffered as I have grown older, it's a lot of my other hobbies too. At one point, I practised three instruments and played in an Orchestra, I acted as stage manager twice a year and studied Spanish and Esperanto in my spare time. Now, it's a mircale if I actually achieve anything in my day other than the required actions of getting up, eating, attending a few lectures and ultimately going back to bed.

Perhaps it's an age thing; perhaps we lose our capacity to manage so many different activities as we grow older. Or maybe we have more responsibilities that prevent us from engaging in something we enjoy. In my case, I think it's more that I am out of habit. I have spent so long in a dark place that does not permit "fun" that I know longer know how to have it. Maybe I can change that again.